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(no subject) [Jan. 12th, 2009|06:35 pm]
I've talked to myself a while, and I've decided to make sure that I take the utmost care in who reads what.  So, from now on, this baby is


I can't afford to lose my sole thought outlet.  I wouldn't be able to do that and stay sane.

I am de-friending everyone.  You may reapply with the following information:
Where I know you from:
How do you feel about me now, before reading over my LJ:

Don't apply if,
- You can't handle adult themes, adult language, and the ramblings of someone with personality disorders out the nose.
- You already dislike me.

If I reject you, you don't be pissy about it.  Move on.

If I put you into a limited friends group, don't be pissy about it.

If I accept you, then you are a cool person.  Make sure that what is written in here, stays in here.
Exception: If you think that I, or someone else may do something that could hurt another person seriously in a physical sense.

Pirates, Ninjas, Hippies, and the Undead are welcome.
Exception: Wannabe vampires are not.
Welcomeness is not limited to the above.
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(no subject) [Jan. 11th, 2009|09:49 am]
[Current Mood |curiouscurious]

Religion...Collapse )
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(no subject) [Jan. 11th, 2009|08:26 am]
Tried ice skating.  I'm just too out of shape to volunteer with the SO.  Makes me very sad.  But, in the end, I just had to make that call myself.  They deserve a better skater to teach them how to skate.  If I'm at the same level as they are, then, well, why bother?  Maybe next year, after I lose a shit ton of weight.  Now, it puts too much stress on my feet and knees.  I wish those kids the best of luck, with someone better at skating. 

Safeway never delivered our grocery order.  Bastards.  We haven't had any food in the house since Friday.  They're already a day late with our order. 

Got to sleep very early last night, woke up with an allergy based coughing fit.  So, after I got it under control, I realized it was 2:30 AM.  I figured I'd check my email.  Bob sent me my writing number, and... a written warning.  It's because I need proper shoes for the job.  Men's business wear is the STUPIDEST thing ever.  I can't wait until I get my doctorate and $500K pension after 10 years.  I'll start up doing pediatric speech therapy, wearing a big ass mohawk, and a nice sweater that seems to say "Hey, I'm your friend.  Me and your caregiver are going to help you learn to speak better."

I will love that.  I will be all set, and I will have nothing to worry about on the monetary end of things.

Right now, the fam is off at church, I think I got a buyer for my violin, and my universe isn't trying to fuck me over at this moment.  OK, so maybe existing isn't that bad right now.
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(no subject) [Jan. 10th, 2009|11:12 am]
This is what my life has boiled down to.  Getting kicks out of making obscure Shakespeare references on a program for the science fair my mom is running.

I came across $70+ in paypal.  Apparently, they changed their minds about the refund.  The dispute record clearly stated that there was no further action required on my part.  I tried to email them and explain that there appears to be an error.  But, since they didn't have any record of the transaction, I couldn't get through to them (you need to explain what the problem is, in a topic and subtopic, then summarize your question in a sentence, and then you need the transaction number.), because they didn't even recognize the transaction number.  WTF?  So, I just transferred it into my bank account.  If they realize that something's wrong, and they want their money back, I have this incident well documented.  I saved a copy of my account history, and emailed myself the document so I have a time stamp.  I also told my dad, which, wouldn't hold up in court as it is hearsay, and he's my father, anyway.  But at least the record shows that I tried to get back to them.  

I prerolled about 60 ciggies last night so that I'd be able to take them with me.  What I really wanted to do was go out and play with someone.  I really needed someone there last night, but, there was no one.  I feel really bad about cancelling the "date" with Briana, I really wanted to hang out with her again.  But, alas, I have less than nothing until either my violin sells or the paypal transfer clears up.  I think it would also be really cool to hang out with suki before she goes back to school, but I guess it's just not in the cards.  :-/

Special Olympics training is today.  Micah and Josiah are going.  I'm probably going, not sure, though.  Buuut, working with kids will be good for me, especially since I will someday become a career pediatric speech therapist. 

I think, therefore it is, time for  another ciggie.
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(no subject) [Jan. 9th, 2009|06:32 pm]

Tough day today.  Product class.  Bob talked forfreakingever about the policies I'm going to offer.  Then had to pick dad up from Upper Merion.  I'll be sleeping like a rock tonight.  Micah has promt and play tomorrow.  I'm going to help out with special olympics tomorrow as well. 

Feel the need to go out tonight.  Don't have the money, energy, or car to do so.  Talk to me if and ya wanna hang out.

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(no subject) [Jan. 8th, 2009|07:36 pm]
[Current Mood |goodgood]

I don't know how I feel about this meditation stuff.  It gives me a strange feeling.  Not a bad feeling, mind you.  It actually felt pretty good.  Just unusual.  Like I was actually significant in some way or another.  Most of my other religious experiences either had a direct scientific cause to them.  I never really felt the presence of god, in any way.  I've felt good before.  I've felt a secure feeling.  But the times I declared to be in God's presence were probably just endorphins and the belief phenomenon.  Not to say that meditation doesn't do the same thing.  It probably does, but I think, if I give it a good enough try, it might take me closer to something apart from myself and my own reality.  I'll have to read Hardcore Zen again.  I think I might understand a little more if I read it again.

My calendar's filling up.  I'm liking this.  A busy schedule always makes me feel better than an empty one.  As I do more and more and keep busier, I feel more energy, and I actually feel useful.  But, this week is almost over.  I have to go to product class tomorrow, and then on Saturday, I go help out with Special Olympics training.  And, I might see if Phoenixville Area Community Services (hereafter, PACS) needs some help.  Then, hell week.  Trevose three times next week from 8-5.  Then, prospecting from 9-5 on Th and F. 
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(no subject) [Jan. 6th, 2009|06:14 pm]

I've looked up CRI, they seem legit.  And so I called.  And scheduled an appointment.  It is quite possible, that my financial problems have been solved...  Let's see how this pans out, shall we?
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I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves! [Jan. 6th, 2009|02:12 pm]
[Current Mood |okayokay]

I've decided to reclassify this muscle burn as a muscle ache.  It is definitely a bad burn, and I'm having trouble lifting my arms up above a certain point.  I should just stick to the machines and not worry about the irons.

I haven't been so tired as I was this morning in a looooooooong time.  But it's rewarding.  I came in this morning, and Micah told me to carry him up the stairs.  I refused, and, as he usually does when he doesn't get his way, he started squeezing my upper arm.  It never hurts, mind you, but this time, I flexed, and he immediately let go, and looked at me, giving me the "what the hell was that?" stare.

And, if this makes me turn into a dipshit jock (that's not to say that all jocks are dipshits, just a vast majority are), someone slap me with a rabid pirhana with AIDS.  That'll teach me to look down on other people.  :-P

Anyway, I think I may have found a buyer for my violin on craigslist.  I apparently have to make $600 in less than two weeks.  This just hit me last night.  I have a lot of debts to catch up on.  I'm working on it, actually, and it looks like I might make it if this guy actually calls me back about the violin.  Of course, this is going to be really shitty if I'm taking Bri out and all... I'll have to start wiping egg of my face now.  Maybe we can arrange just watching pirated films and drinking a 6 pack of cheap ass beer.  You know, American beer is like making love in a canoe.  It's fucking close to water...

Anyway, I've got to do something real quick.  Later, folks!
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(no subject) [Jan. 5th, 2009|07:19 am]
[Current Mood |chipperchipper]

*squeals with delight*

I got meself a hot date with a girl I have no chance with!

That's right, ladies and gents, I'm going out with an uber hottie named Briana this week!  W00t!

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(no subject) [Jan. 3rd, 2009|09:26 am]
Random convo coming from somewhere else...

Me: Yea, there's this one guy who used to be a girl that I know.
Dad: How old is she?
Me: He is 19-20 or so.
Dad: and her parent's let her mutilate herself like that?
Me: What do you mean?
Dad: You know...
Me: I don't think he did anything.  I think he is just more comfortable being thought of and being a guy.
Dad: Oh, so she's just pretending.
Conversation went on like this.  It came to a point where I said that I usually don't act any different around guys or girls.  Of course, this got him pretty upset, and I'm wondering, is it normal to not care whether someone is a guy or a girl?  I mean, the only difference with this guy/girl is that I'm never going to ask him out.  I notice the distinction, but honestly I don't care, unless I really like a girl.  

Is that very abnormal?
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